The Thrill of it All
by Mrs.Uzumaki-Dragneel
Summary: Neither can remember how it all started, all they know is that they are in too deep to back out now. A twisted fate and a merry-go-round of pain was all it took for them to fall into the abyss. She uses him to forget the pain out of her mask, and he uses her to forget the pain inside his.
1. Marinette and Her Mask

Hello everyone, I enjoyed writing for the Miraculous Ladybug Fandom so much that I wanted to try again. This time I went with something a little darker. Right now its going to stay as a two chapter one shot. I may add to it later depending on what you guys think. I'll take any feedback or any ideas in the reviews. Let me know what you guy would like to see come out of this and I will try my bet to deliver it for you guys. For now, Auntie Dragneel out.

The Thrill of it All

I see how you look at me, eyes greener than the purest emerald. Mouth curved into the softest of smiles. I can tell how you adore me. I can't though. I don't remember how we got here. Mouths clashing together, tension higher than the tightrope we dance across. I want to be able to love you the way you love me, but I just don't. The damage has been done, I can't go back now. I've done this to you, I let the boy that as under the mask, whoever he may be, fall in love with nothing more than a mask.

If I could take it all back I wouldn't. I couldn't. I'm too selfish. I can't get it from him, so I pull it from you. You were too willing, too broken to see it for what it was when it started. Over time, I saw the light leave your eyes. You let me use you until I was satisfied, I watched your heart break every time we parted ways.

Every time I flee back to my own house and within five minutes you are there. You perch on my balcony, eyes red and puffy, telling me how you let her use you again. Once again you are pouring your heart out to the girl without the mask. I let it pull at my heart strings again and pull you in for a hug. I let you use me, to hold me. You pretend I am her, you use me to pretend she loves you. Just like I use you to pretend he loves me. I still have no idea why you chose me to find comfort in after my other half would leave you in pieces.

If only you knew, the girl who tortures you so and the girl you seek comfort in were one and the same. It makes me sick to think about, how could I just drag you in the mud like that? Tikki tells me it's a bad idea, that I'll only come out more hurt in the end. How can I bring myself to care? I have nothing else to lose. Adrien doesn't look at me the way Chat does, it doesn't matter if I have the mask on or not, he still sees me. With the mask, he sees me with love, without the mask, he sees me with sadness clouding his eyes. With nothing short of loneliness on his face he gazes at me, but at least he sees me. Adrien looks straight through me, at least when I don't have the mask on.

It's a twisted game we play with each other. I use you and in turn you use me. When you come to me as Marinette, you know of my pain. I tell you of Adrien, I tell you how invisible I am to him. In turn, you tell me of Ladybug and how she pulls at your heart strings. Every time you leave, you tell me Adrien will notice me one day, and I tell you that Ladybug will one day stop using you. It makes us both smile for a moment, but deep down I know Ladybug won't stop using you and you can't guarantee that Adrien will notice me.

Alright you guys, hit that sexy review button to let me know what you think. Until next time!


	2. Chat Noir and his life

Alright, here is the second chapter. Like I said last chapter, let me know what you guys are looking for next from this story and I will be happy to write more. I hope you enjoyed it up to this point. Thank you for your support and your time.

Auntie Dragneel out.

The Thrill of it All

I see how you look at me, eyes bluer than the rarest sapphire. Cheeks engulfed in red, words fumbling from your lips. I can see how you love me. I can't though. I don't remember how all of this started. Hands sliding across any skin they can find, heartrates that can match a hummingbird's. I want to be able to adore you the way you adore me, but I can't. The damage has been done, I can't go back to before. I let her do this the me, I let the girl under the mask, whoever she may be, trick me into falling in love with nothing more than a mask.

If I could take it back, I'm not sure I would. I'm selfish enough. I let her delude me into thinking she loves me, I let her pull what she needs from my embraces. I was too willing, too broken to stop her when she first reached for me. I was blind, I didn't see it for what it was, but then I did, and I couldn't bring myself to care.

Ever time, without fail, she would leave, and I would run to you. The classmate I knew who was loving and caring enough to take me in, to let me trap her with my pain. I would arrive with tears flowing from my eyes, still raw from the pain she left in me. I would pull your heart strings, sweet Marinette, and use you, just like she was using me. You hold me, and give me the love I crave, even though I know it isn't true. You don't know you are holding your beloved Adrien in your hands, I still don't know why you let me do this to you.

If only you knew, the boy who pretends to be painfully oblivious in class and the boy who comes to you in the night seeking comfort were one and the same. It makes me ill to think about, how could I torture you in such a way? Plagg tells me that I shouldn't handle things this way, it'll only end badly. I can't bring myself to care. Ladybug doesn't look at me the way Marinette does, it doesn't matter if I have the mask on or not, she still sees me. Without the mask, she sees me with love, with the mask, she sees me with loneliness. With nothing less than guilt on her face she stares at me, but at least she sees me. Ladybug looks straight through me, at least when I have the mask on.

It's a fucked-up merry-go-round we are on. She uses me and in turn I use you. When I come to you as Chat, I know you understand my pain. I tell you all about Ladybug's wicked ways of the heart. In turn, you tell me all about how Adrien looks right through you. Every time I leave, I tell you Adrien will notice you one day, and you tell me that Ladybug will one day stop using me. It makes both of us smile for a moment, but deep down I know Adrien won't stop looking straight through you and you can't guarantee that Ladybug will stop using me.

Hit that Sexy Review button and let me know what you think. Until next time!


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